Place thy mark here and all ye links will open a new window

And THEN what happened?!

August 29, 2002

Last night I got taken out to dinner by my family for my birthday. I couldn't think of any particular restaurant that I wanted to go to so I let the Clanlad pick. I thought he would choose the Macaroni Grill because he likes to draw on the tablecloth but evidently he and his grandmother found a new place. Roadhouse Cafe (which I think is either owned by or the same as Red River) in Springfield Plaza not only has paper tablecloths for drawing on but also gives you a bucket of peanuts in the shell for your pre-meal enjoyment.

The food was good. I had the grilled salmon and a salad. Unfortunately I ate too much and the Clanchief tummy was not happy last night. Of course I don't learn so I had some ice cream cake that night also.

The Clanchief's Birthday Totals
Birthday cards (snailmail)2Celly
Birthday cards (e-mail)4Celly
Birthday cards (hand delivered)3Mom, Clanlad and Clanlad's mother
Glazed birthday plate1painted by the Clanlad
Pottery dolphin statue1painted by the Clanlad
Pottery snake box1painted by the Clanlad
Called "old man"8Sunni
Sheep pin (sans undies)1Lisa, John, Samantha, Lexi and Travis
Birthday wishes (email, IM and AFR)37Assorted freaks and loved ones

Due to popular demand (and because I'm greedy!) I will be holding over my birthday through the holiday weekend. So it's not too late to run out to the store and get me something!

Yes, as a matter of fact, I am five. Why do you ask?

~ 15 coins donated

Happy Birthday to...

August 28, 2002


That's right my beloved loyal reader, today the Clanchief turns 35. I expect that there will be some hijinx this weekend at MDRF when Celly comes up. I'm not entirely sure what she has planned but I'm resonably certain it doesn't involve men giving me roses. I still think that 35 different Wenches should offer up their posteriors to me for spankings. Of course hugs and kisses will always be accepted.

Now I'm off to take my Geritol.

~ 18 coins donated

Countdown to the Clanchief's birthday...

August 27, 2002

Only 1 more day


How I spent my summer vacation...

August 27, 2002

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
A tale of a fateful trip.
That started from a southern port,
Aboard a tiny ship.

The mate was a mighty sailing lass,
The captain brave and sure.
Two passengers set sail that day,
For a seven day tour, a seven day tour.

The weather was already hot,
And the crew quickly stripped.
They both thanked God for the lake,
In which they quickly dipped.

Three acres of ground rise from the lake, a wooded deserted isle,
With your Clanchief
His Lady too,
Two cabins and a priv-vvvy,
Two hummingbirds, one cute bat and pair of fish,
Here on Baldwin's Isle!

"It is never this hot here!"

This was the constant topic of conversation from almost everyone we met in Maine. Evidently the 90+ degree heat broke records all the way back to the 1800s. Naturally this was the week that Celly and I took our vacation to the backwoods of the great lobster state. Her grandfather had bought a 3 acre island on a lake in the early 1900's and her family has been going up every summer since. We flew from Raleigh to Boston to Bangor on Saturday. In Bangor we rented a car at the airport where I promptly proceeded to lock the keys in the trunk. Once AAA arrived and unlocked the door we popped the trunk, got the keys and went to lunch.

We met up with Celly's sister, brother-in-law and nephews at a place called Captain Nick's. It's right across from the airport. If you ever find yourself in Bangor, Maine lemme tell ya... they have the best lobster sandwiches there. Yum!

After lunch we stopped by a grocery store for supplies and then began our 50 mile trek into the wilds of Maine. That's right, fifty miles. Now granted here in the land of the perpetual highway, that doesn't sound like much. However, the majority of this trip was along a gravel logging road with axle-eating potholes just waiting for some unsuspecting city folk to come along and provide a late afternoon snack. And no, I didn't break the car. I might have dinged it a little, but what the hell, it's a rental.

We finally arrived at the boat landing on the shore of Nickatous Lake (upper right of Hancock County). There we met the island's caretaker, Jeff, who ferried us out to Baldwin Island. I got the quick tour before dinner and then we collapsed into bed.

I won't bore you with a blow by blow (Shoosh!) account of the week. There were two different canoes on the island as well as a paddleboat and two motorboats. We played around in all but the smaller motorboat. In my own defense, it had been 10 years since I was in a canoe and the stern seat (that's the one in the back, not a harsh and forbidding chair) in this particular model was level with the gunwale. So you can see how easily it would be to tip the canoe over dumping the bow's (that would be the front part) occupant into the water. Twice.

Despite the previous story, I am very familiar with canoes although granted I've only used them on whitewater. I had however, never driven a motorboat of any size or shape. The first time we went out in the motorboat, Celly drove. She also tried to make me fish. Now, I'm not violently or ethically opposed to fishing but I've just never gotten any kind of thrill from it. I knew we had a ton of perfectly delicious food in the refrigerator back at the camp so I didn't feel any pressing need to hasten innocent marine life to their final reward. Plus, cleaning them is just a pain in the ass. So basically, I'm too lazy to fish.

I did get to drive the boat after that! Wheee! It's like riding a water-motorcycle. I was pretty damn good at bring it into the dock too. Even the day we had three foot waves and whitecaps. After that I proclaimed myself "Captain of the Lake (tm)" and said so to anyone who would listen. Considering Celly was the only other person on the island I was mostly met with an amused and patronizing smirk. *sigh* It's so hard to find good help these days.

Did I mention it was HOT?! Well, it was. I mean that energy-sucking I-don't-want-to-move kind of hot. I didn't even have any cable t.v. or internet to distract me from it! (Helpful Clanchief Hint: When eating lobster naked, keep the melted butter away from the edge of the table. I'm just saying.) I finally convinced Celly that we needed to go back into town on Wednesday. Mainly because this meant at least two hours in an air-conditioned car. We went back to Bangor and found a place to eat, walked around the mall and stopped into the local Harley Davidson boutique. I say "boutique" because they only sold the clothes, not the motorcycles. They had some set out for display but it wasn't a real shop. We even went to a JoAnn's just to browse their wool selection. I thought it kind of strange that a fabric store in Maine didn't have any wool but it's not like we had any room in the suitcases to ship some back.

Once we were sitting out on the porch in rocking chairs just reading our books and two hummingbirds swooped over and sort of hovered about two feet in front of me. Then they flew off. Celly and I laughed about it but we checked the hummingbird feeder and sure enough it was empty. I don't know if they picked me because I was the closest, because I was naked or if they had a little meeting beforehand and voted. Evidently it it is my responsibility to keep the feeder filled with sugar water.

I got a little more used to the heat after that but I was still glad to get back to the land of A/C and internet connectivity. Other than the airline putting my luggage on the wrong damn plane, the trip home was uneventful. Thus endeth the tale.

P.S. Pictures can be found ovah heah.

~ 2 coins donated

Rawk Lobstah

August 21, 2002

I bet you think this is going to be where I regale you all with amusing anecdotes from my vacation in the wild backcountry of Maine. Nope. I still haven't written anything about my trip. I don't know if I'm being lazy or my brain is still on vacation but I just can't seem to come up with any good stories right now.

Fear not, loyal reader, for I shall now present you with this, the Rawk Lobstah, with which to amuse yourself! Enjoy.

~ 9 coins donated

Gone Fishin'

August 9, 2002

Well, it's that time of year my wee ones. I am off on vacation for the next week with my sweetie. We'll be all alone... on a small island... with no electricity... no distractions like television or telephones or computers. Whatever shall we do?


Exactly. Call Guinness.

~ 5 coins donated

Take Me Out To The Ballgame...

August 6, 2002

This past weekend I took the ClanLad to a Potomac Cannons baseball game (against the Winston-Salem Warthogs). It was Cub Scout night so stands were packed with little boys in blue or tan uniforms. Well, the cheapseats were anyway. It was the Lad's very first baseball game. Once I explained what all the numbers and words on the scoreboard meant, he enjoyed giving me and everyone around us a running update regarding the score and statistics. This lasted until about the 7th inning and then we went to walk around a bit. We went back to our seats to catch the last inning and cheer as the mighty Cannons blew away the 'Hogs 7-1.

After the game, there was a fireworks show. The cool thing about this show was that the launch area was about 200 feet to our right. We were literally right under the fireworks as they exploded. Luckily it had been threatening rain earlier in the evening so I had an umbrella with me. When ash and fallout started raining down on us, that came in fairly handy I tell you.

After the fireworks the Cub Scouts took over the outfield. The plan was to set up tents and campout over night. This is the part that the Lad was really excited about. You should have seen his face when I brought home his very first sleeping bag. *g* I was promptly informed that now he could have sleepovers. I'm not sure what the hindrance was (besides his mother) prior to his obtaining said sleeping bag.

The organizers also played the movie "Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius" on the big screen until about midnight. The Lad laid in the tent and watched from there. Then it was lights out and everyone tried to sleep. I didn't sleep a wink all night because it was entirely too muggy for me. By 6:30 AM I had enough so I woke the Lad up and we packed up the tent and headed for home.

Thus endeth the tale.

~ 3 coins donated

Holy bugfucking SHIT!

August 3, 2002

I know. You're sitting there in stunned silence wondering what has gotten the Clanchief so worked up on such a lovely hot summer day, right? I can't believe it myself. Since there's no way to break it to you gently, I guess I'll just have to come right out and say it.

The Red-Haired Snipe is getting married!


In Las Vegas!

On the INTERNET! (which I have to miss because I'm taking the ClanLad to a baseball game and camping tonight.)

That's right, I mean the webmistress to the International Wenches Guild. Rusty. The Booger Queen. Ethel. Is getting married.*phew* I still can't believe it. Oh, I don't mean that she's not marriage worthy. I mean, I can't believe that I didn't hear a single rumor or get a single whiff that this was even a remote possibility. I mean, I'm the Clanchief, damnit! *pout*

I know she knows I wish her the best, and I hope to get to hear all about it. I'm just still in shock ovah heah.

Hmmm.... I wonder if she'll wear her chainmaille...

~ 3 coins donated