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Question of the Week

July 30, 2001

...or "How YOU Can Help the Clanchief Get His Mac On".

Would it be a better idea to carry one rose or several while walking about the shire? Why are you of this opinion?

~ 3 coins donated

Sherpa Club

July 30, 2001

Let's just clear up a few things from my last post, shall we?

1) The first rule of bing a sherpas is... No Alcohol.
2) The second rule of being a sherpa is... No Alcohol. Sherpas are not allowed to drink since they tend to keep wanting to stop at every pub we pass. Unfortunately this interferes with my shopping progress and makes the sherpas less than enthusiastic about toting heavy packages.
3) Sherpas make very little cash. They're usually paid in candy bars and yak droppings. However, I always have an available... position for any willing and wanting (wanton?) Wench. ;)
4) Yes, it's true. It was all Ani Moorehead's idea to switch hotels. The pool was very refreshing after a full day at Faire... once I finally got to it, that is. (Ooops, was that my outloud voice?? *eg*)

Anyway, I will post the few pictures I took at NYRF (Tux) sometime this week. First, I desperately need sleep though! I will probably be going back up this coming weekend too. I didn't get to spend nearly enough time with the Clan Denmother, the Wonderful Whizzr of There and the Spawn.

I'll post a more detailed review of my travels later, but while mentally reviewing on the drive home, I came to the conclusion that I didn't kiss nearly enough hands or give nearly enough roses. I did manage to flirt a little bit though (Shoosh you, I was only flirting, I wasn't going to keep her!) I mentioned this to one of my Loyal Readers and it was suggested that I get six or so roses to carry around in case a lass crossed my path that caught my eye. I pointed out that mayhap the Lass In Question (or LIQ. Go ahead, pronounce it outloud... *eg*) might doubt the sincerity of my words if she notices that I'm holding 4 or 5 other roses. So I have posted the above Question of the Week in the fervent hopes that you, my dear readers, will offer the Clanchief some reasoning and advice in case I make it back to Tux this weekend.

~ 2 coins donated

The Story of "N"

July 27, 2001

A couple of people have inquired about "N" since I haven't said anything about her this week. Well, there's good reason for that actually. Last Friday I received an email from her saying how much she enjoyed the movie Thursday and that she would like to go out the next (this) week again. Naturally I was riding that endorphin high all weekend. Until Sunday that is. When I got home from the Southside Johnny concert Sunday night and checked my email I found a "Dear Gareth" letter. Yes, sadly she gave up before it really got started. What's really sad though is that I'm getting used to it. I don't want to though. So I'm wading back into the dating pool... slowly and cautiously.

'Cause, y'know, it's cold in there!

In work news, I just got my review done and did very well. They're going to toss a few more crumbs into what they laughingly refer to as my paycheck. We're supposed to have a meeting sometime this afternoon where they'll hand out exactly what everyone's raise is. Immediately following that, I shall be hitting the road to New York. The New York Renaissance Faire starts this weekend in Tuxedo, NY. The weather forecast looks good if not a bit humid. That's okay though, I made sure to get a hotel with a pool. *g* I swear, I'm getting so spoiled in my old age. I remember I used to travel to faire and camp, sleep in my car or get a $20 per night fleabag motel room. Now I practically have to have room service and a personal concierge. I figure in a couple of years, I'll just hire sherpas to follow me around at Faire and carry my purchases.

Anyone looking for a job? *g*

~ 4 coins donated

A Week In the Life of a 6 Year Old Boy

July 25, 2001

Last Thursday the Clanlad lost his first baby tooth at school! Well, he didn't actually lose it, it just finally fell out. He bit into something at lunch and it came out so the teacher put it in a litle plastic baggie for him to take home. You would think that would be like the highlight of the day, the first thing he would babble about on the way home from daycare. You would be wrong. He didn't tell anyone until his mother noticed the gap that was previously occupied by the tooth. So he reaches in his pocket and pulls out the baggie with a casual, "Oh yeah. It came out at lunch today."

On Saturday I took the boy to see Jurassic Park III. We didn't just go to any old movie theater though. No, we went to the brand new (less than a month old) AMC Hoffman theater. I love that theater. Not only is it about 3 miles from my house but it has 22 theaters, ALL with stadium seating! It's great for seeing the big action flicks. I want to see Planet of the Apes there, but I'm going to try to catch it while I'm in NY this weekend. (more on that later)

Monday night the Clanlad successfully completed his Level 1 swim class. Yay! He didn't get a certificate or anything. Although he did get a checklist showing that he could do things like float on his back unassisted, hold his face in the water for 3 seconds and kick off the wall. I'm gonna miss that class... cause you know his swim coach was an uber hottie! *sigh* Yeah, I'm gonna miss that class...

Tuesdays are when his daycare class goes to the pool for most of the day. If you were in the DC area yesterday (Tuesday) you know that it was close to 100 degrees and very sunny. Mix that with a couple adults and 20 five and six year olds and guess what happened. Yup, the lad got sunburned. His pale little back and shoulders are bright red and tender. Do you remember that commercial for sunblock where the little boy tells his mother that he "got sunburned and feels like a french fry."? Well, that was him. Except of course, he was screaming unintelligibly at the top of his lungs. Also on Tuesday, he started his Level 2 class. I think this time I'm going to print up a certificate on the color printer at work. It will be nice for him to look back in a couple years and see his swim certificate on his bedroom wall. Who knows, he may turn out to be the next Johnny Weissmuller.

~ What's your 2 pence?

My Virginity Is Gone

July 23, 2001

Yes, it's true. I've finally lost it... had my cherry popped... given up my innocence. And I'm not the only one. Faith was there and lost her virginity too. In fact, we both lost ours at the same time. This cherry-popping, innocence-stealing of which I speak is wholly due to Sherry who baptized us into the world of Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes. The music is blues/rock and like most concerts, very loud. Queen Maggie and Richard also joined us, as well as David (according to Sherry, ALL Jukes fans are named David...) who was to be the designated ChewToy for the evening. He seemed to take it pretty well although as Queen Maggie said, "Poor boy has no idea what he's gotten himself into.".

~ 1 coin donated

Time enough...

July 21, 2001

Well, this was a pretty busy week for the old Clanchief. Monday and Wednesday nights I had swim practice with the Clanlad. Unfortunately I had to pick him up from daycare and take him so I didn't have the "by myself" time that I need to do my laps. So we played in the water some and I helped him practice his backstroke and pushing off the wall. He's becoming quite the little fish. *g*

On Thursday night I went to see The Score with "N". It was an alright flick but I wouldn't really recommend it. Marlon Brando was good and surprisingly I liked Edward Norton's (Did ya know he was born in Columbia, MD??) performance better than Robert DiNero's. The end result though was a very formulaic film.

I know, I know... YOU want to know how things went with "N", don't you? Well, I'm not one to kiss and tell. *smirk* Although I did almost swoon when she held my hand. *g* And she's a really good hugger. We're taking it slow and casual. No pressure, no rushing.

Tomorrow night (Sunday) I'll be escorting the luscious Faith and the scrumptious Sherry to the Southside Johnny concert at the Birchmere in Alexandria. I've heard his music and seen a concert video but I don't own any of his stuff nor have I seen him live. Good thing I'm going with one of his premiere groupies! *g*

Speaking of groupies... the In Our Cups website went live this weekend. Now for those of you who don't know, In Our Cups is a brand new musical trio consisting of Darcy (of the Pyrates Royale fame and quite the musician in her own right on that Bonky Thing (tm)), Sherry and Faith. I, being their Official #1 Groupie, must encourage you, as my loyal readers, to go visit. There's not much up there yet, but I have loaned out the Castle Ogres with strict instructions to obediently service the three lovelies.

Hmmm... I wonder if they'll ever come back!?

~ What's your 2 pence?

An Anniversary... of sorts

July 17, 2001

I just realized yesterday that it was this very week, one year ago, that I was laid up in the hospital with a massive bloodclot (internationally known as "Dot, the Scottish Clot" thanks to Da Bug) which stretched from ankle to groin in my right leg. It's weird to think back on the last year. I still notice every "Who's Yer Shepherd?" pin. Did you know The Rogues actually wear them?!?! That's just freaky. I mean, they're Grammy nominated artists... and they're wearing MY pin! So much has changed and yet so much hasn't. Don't worry, I'm not going to go into some maudlin and lengthy post about what I'm thankful for or anything. I just thought it was interesting to note.

Oh, and I'm doing okay currently. It kind of comes and goes... yadda, yadda, yadda. Although I am overdue for a bloodtest. (Wow. I actually heard the nagging as I typed that last bit... you people frighten me.)

~ 7 coins donated

Hold the MSG, please...

July 15, 2001

Well, I had my date on Saturday. I met "N" (we'll call her "N" for now because not everyone wants to be immortalized on here) in Old Town. We sat and chatted for about a half hour before deciding to walk over to the Torpedo Factory. For those of you unfamiliar with this area, the Torpedo Factory used to be just that. Now it is an "artists colony" of sorts. It's full of artist studios... jewelry, pottery, weaving, painting, etc... that you can enter and actually talk to the artists as well as buy things. We saw some really amazing designs and ideas. Of course the two that I wanted were $2000 and $15,000 respectively. Yeah, I'll just smash the piggy bank and get those right away. :)

Back to the story. After walking all through the Torpedo Factory, we headed over to Ben & Jerry's for ice cream (I had Vanilla Heath Bar Crunch and "N" had Strawberry, in case you were wondering). Well, it was hot and we did walk an awful lot... anyway, we walked over to the water and sat on a park bench to watch the ducks and sparrows beg for food. After talking for a while, it was decided that two hours was a good length for a first date. I walked her back to her car and said goodbye.

Now the whole way home I'm thinking that was it. She didn't seem to have had a good time (even though "N" is a very happy woman with a great smile and an infectious laugh) and I'll probably never hear from her again. So it was with some trepidation that I opened the email she sent me later that night, only to discover that she did have a good afternoon and wanted to see me again. So we'll see what happens.

I also had a first date planned for Sunday afternoon, but that one never materialized since the woman in question didn't call me. So I'm batting 500 in the dating world so far, but I figure it's good that I'm actually out there trying to be a normal human being. (The Peanut Gallery can all just "Shoosh!" right now....) I'm really just at the point that I don't feel the need to jump into another relationship, which is what I tend to do. I'm told that this "dating" thing is good for you and someone even described it as my "Dim Sum" summer. Y'know, basically trying lots of different things. I don't know what that says about me -- having my social life compared to a Chinese buffet -- but then I'm probably better off not thinking about it too much.

~ 1 coin donated

The Unclean Masses

July 13, 2001

Recently I have been perusing some dating sites on the web and I've noticed an alarming trend in personal ads placed by females. I had a chance to discuss this trend briefly with The Marcy when she was here last weekend and she did indeed confirm the validity of these women's fears. It seems that right up there with "sense of humor", "physically fit" and "dump truck full of cash" an overwhelming majority of women are requesting prospective dates with "good personal hygiene". At first I thought that maybe I was misunderstanding the term or that it might be some sort of female code for "huge penis". The Marcy assured me this was not the case. She immediately went off on her favorite subject... bellybutton care & maintenance, but I quickly reigned her in by offering to let her check mine right there in public.

Still, I was shocked, I tell you. I can't believe that someone would go on a date (especially a first date) without showering, brushing, scrubbing and generally being fungus free. You know, comb your hair, put on deodorant, wear clothes from the closet not the floor. If you're feeling particularly wild and crazy, go ahead and slap some cologne on. La vida loca, baby!

I only bring this to forefront of our collective consciousness because of the fact that I shall hopefully be going on a First Date this weekend. Yes, we started corresponding through a personal ad site, but I figure hey, it's the 21st century. She's in the IT field and her main hobby is spinning & weaving. Not in a martial arts way but in a yarn and wool way. You know what that means, don't you? Free kilting material for life! Whoo-hoo! *g* I shall of course keep you, my faithful readers, informed regarding the results of said date.

If you'll excuse me now, I have to go scrub my bellybutton.

~ 2 coins donated

So a Pyrate, a girly Girl and a Lush walk into a coffeehouse...

July 10, 2001

How many of you are wondering how my To-Do list for July is progressing? Well, it doesn't matter 'cause it's my site, so I'm going to tell you anyway. :p I know it's the same list that I had for June but since I kind of made it up on the fly it'll still work for July.

10) Plot for MDRF *eg*...Sadly, I didn't get around to this one...but soon. *EG*
9) Go out on a at least one date...I haven't done this one yet either... technically
8) Spend more time outside...I uh... well, it's still early!
7) Study for my certificates...Now where did I put those books??
6) Study MORE...Damn, I know they're here somewhere...
5) Work out regularly...*whew* I have to rest from all that searching first.
4) Start swimming regularly...Now this one I *have* done. Go me!
3) Do a little dance...Hmmm... no, can't say that I've done this one yet
2) Make a little love...Well, it all depends on your definition of "love" now doesn't it? *eg*
1) Get down tonight!Did it!

Okay, so you want more details about #1 don't you? Well, Saturday night was the Pyrates Royale performance at Cerridwen's Coffeehouse. In Our Cups, that tempting trio of Darcy, Faith and Sherry, was the first act of the evening. Their a capella melodies are like honey to the ear. I can't wait until they have a CD. I'm not just saying that because they're all friends either. I really love to hear them sing, individually or as a group. After the group gave their version of a "shout out" to Todd and The Marcy (who came all the way from Bah-ston), it as Darcy's turn to play with her Bonky Thing. Most of her selections had her accompanied by Skivee from the Pyrates Royale. One song that she did (I can't remember the name of it... but Darcy described it as "the pretty song") was not the "definition of melancholy" as Skivee put it. So there. :p

Next up was Tinsmith. I had never heard this group, but had to buy the CD as soon as I did. They play "progressive folk music" according to their website, with heavy leanings toward the Celtic end of that spectrum. Unfortunately the site doesn't work in Netscape because they have a lot of open table tags. *sigh*

The Pyrates Royale finished up the evening's entertainment with lots of songs from the NEW CD... and showed remarkable restraint in mentioning the CD Release Party. I mean, you would have expected them to run the announcement of the Release Party just as far into the ground as any self respecting pirate could, and I'm not saying Captain Moon here specifically would ever do such a thing as to constantly mention the CD Release Party... but you know. *g* I think I better stop there before I'm boarded or something...

~ 1 coin donated

Top 10 Things To Do

July 6, 2001

Okay, it was pointed out that I have neglected you, my loyal readers, by not telling you exactly what I wanted to accomplish last month. Since I would rather have a brillo pad soaked in tabasco sauce dragged across my tongue for an hour than disappoint the faithful, I give you the Top 10 Things On The Clanchief's To-Do List:

10) Plot for MDRF *eg*...
9) Go out on a at least one date...
8) Spend more time outside...
7) Study for my certificates...
6) Study MORE...
5) Work out regularly...
4) Start swimming regularly...
3) Do a little dance...
2) Make a little love...
And the #1 thing on the Clanchief's To-Do List is...

Get down tonight!

~ 1 coin donated


July 6, 2001

Wow... it's already July. The summer is half over and I feel like it should be sometime in April. I'm not ready for Summer! Damnit, I had things that I wanted to have done by now. Admittedly I have accomplished some things, just not all. And y'know how that just eats aways at my inner Virgo...

I did nothing for the 4th of July, except sleep late and consume valuable oxygen. The Clanlad was off at a cookout somewhere and it started pouring down rain (complete with thunder and lightning) right before sunset, thus negating any notions of trying to watch colored explosions in the night sky. I love thunderstorms though. There is something very primal and sensual about them. Plus the rhythm of the rain tapping the glass or echoing off the pavement is calming. Maybe that's the appeal of storms... the steady, almost monotonous, beat of the rain as the backdrop for the wildly unpredictable flashes of skyfire and the shock of the thunder as it reverberates through the core of your being.

Either that or I'm just stranger than people suspect.

~ 5 coins donated

My Bitches

July 3, 2001

Those sheepies are my bitches